Olympic Wrap Up, Thank You's, and Betting Line Results

You think the Olympics ended Sunday night?  Well with Olympic Correspondent Royer, the Olympics are never over! NEVER... actually, I think he knows its time to leave London, scrapbook the hell out of the past couple weeks, and refocus on preparing for the next Olympics, all while crying just a little, not too much though, just a little.  

The Last London Olympic Post. I’m tearing up a bit (I told you guys he might cry!). I’m sure ya’ll are beyond Olympic’d out so I will keep this brief.

Thank You Ginger Bear for letting me take over your blog for the past 3 weeks. If you are in the Boston area and saw that obnoxious commercial about the one news lady a million times you will understand this reference. I have always felt the need to tell the world the news, the Olympic news. So thank you Editor Sims for giving me a great forum and adding some great images and insight.

Editor- Your Really Fucking Welcome OCR!

Thank You Olympics for providing lots of fun guessing activities. Overall I think I did a decent job. Maybe a bronze medal performance? There were definitely a few guesses that were terrible. (Ryan Hall, I just bought your book, how can you disappoint me by not even finishing?)

Royer’s Final Prediction Scorecard

Correct: 15

In the ballpark but still wrong: 10

Not even close: 7

Thank You Olympians for being so Smokin Hot. As promised here are my top 5 hottest Olympians:

5) Laura Robson, Great Britain, Tennis, Silver, Mixed Doubles with Andy Murray

Girl Next Door Hot

4) Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce, Jamaica, Track & Field, Gold 100M, Silver 200M & 4x100M Relay

My Hair is always a little poofy but I’m fast as Fuck Hot 

3) Jaqueline Carvalho, Brazil, Indoor Volleyball, Gold

I’m Brazilian and can spike like a mofo hot.
OCR had picked a different pic, I over-ruled, this one's better cuz she's hammering this other lady! 

2) Alex Morgan, USA, Soccer, Gold

I’m good at soccer and just straight up hot, hot. 

1)Elisa Di Francisca, Italy, Fencing (Foil), Gold Individual & Team Foil

I have the passion of a volcano and spirit of a warrior hot. 

Thank You Olympics for only being about two weeks. My average night’s sleep was 5.5 hours and this past weekend my body started revolting by falling asleep standing up at multiple times (prove it!). I don’t think I could have handled much more Olympic competition in terms of my physical health. Things I’ve learned: I need to take vacation time next summer Olympics.  Editor's suggestion to Royer- You should prolly apply to volunteer at the next Olympics, I think you're qualified as long as you don't come off as obsessive on the application...

Thank You Elizabeth Tweddle for winning my Most British Athlete award. Your name is British, your appearance is British & you won an unexpected bronze medal on the uneven bars. Like many of your compatriots, you won a medal in a sport that made many viewers go huh like the long jump and double in 5 & 10k. Be proud Elizabeth Tweddle. You represent your home.

Thank You American Lady Athletes for kicking ass and taking names these Olympic Games. They are bringing home 58.5 medals (mixed doubles screwing things up) with 29 of them gold compared to the men’s 45.5 medals with only 17 gold. The US female gender as a whole peaked at the right time while, like always, the men have peaked too soon. Zoom Zoom Zoom. But seriously nice job ladies, and men please step it up for Rio.

Settle down ladies, you'll over-heat the dogs with all your gold! 

Thank You Rio for helping spread the Olympics to a new continent. The Olympics now move to South America for the first time and I am pumped. The world will talk shit about safety blah blah blah but if the Olympics are to remain a global event they need to take a stop around all parts of the world. I have faith they will do an excellent job and I am counting down the days.

And last but not least THANK YOU all for joining me on my Olympic Journey. I am working diligently on the scrapbook during daylight hours and hope to be done within the week. Please contact me directly for a viewing. I’ve really enjoyed sharing my enthusiasm and look forward to coming back as Olympic Correspondent during Sochi 2014. I’m sure I will make some other appearances before we journey to Russia in different ways but as always Higher Faster Stronger and AMURICA.

And now the moment you've all been waiting for...

Nick's Pre-Olympic betting odds, Results Edition: If you've kept up with the blog you know that I set some betting lines throughout the lead up to the games, here are the results to best of my and the interweb's knowledge (also, I'm kinda surprised how close I got to some of these, others not so much.):

• # of medals Finland will win for non-shooting events: +/- 1.5 result: 3
• # of total medals China will win in Table Tennis +/- 4 result: 6
• Over/Under # of USA Gold Medals +/- 34.5  result: 46
• Most overall medals for a Scandinavian country-> Early Favorite-Sweden @ -150 (but I like Norway as a dark horse) result: Denmark with 9 medals just beat out Sweden with 8 medals, Norway remained a dark horse finishing with 4 medals
• # of medals (men or women) won by China in Trampoline +/- 3.5  result: 4
• total # of gold medals won by all African nations +/- 10  result: 11
• Spice Girls make an appearance at opening ceremonies (-150)  result: 1/2 credit, closing ceremonies

Finally, I would like take the time to thank Royer for his posts, updates, intimate/alone-time thoughts, and his unwavering commitment to share the Olympic Fever with a bunch of people who may or may not like, understand, tolerate, or even know how to read (fact- 22% of the people who view this blog cannot and refuse to learn how to read, demographic science!) about the London 2012 games. But, you know what, Royer shared it anyways, whether you liked it or not, freedom isn't free buddy! While this may be OCR's last Olympic report for London 2012, I'm in the works getting getting Royer on as a special correspondent on an in-depth investigation/ feature on the person that is Channel-K, hopefully coming later this fall (you won't wanna miss this- "Don't bother me while I'm cleaning my Room!: Protein, Pranks, and Panic, The Story Behind Channel K").

Olympic Correspondent Royer's Medal Count Analysis

At this point, you may be all Olympic-ed out.  If that's the case, as coach Ditka once said, STOP IT!  Olympic Correspondent Royer is here to help make sense of what we've seen so far and what to look for in the last few days of competition.  Enjoy it, it'll be another 4 years until we care about handball or water polo again...

Medal Count Analysis

Hello USA/Olympic/Bear Enthusiasts. The Olympics are winding down. We are seeing some great team sport finals and the Spice Girls are unfortunately getting ready to reunite. I’ll take this time to discuss the medal count table. Bob Costas usually flashes it real quick at 11:59pm every night but I’m going to take your through some highlights of how the top countries are getting their medals.

1)      USA-Current Count 90 (39 Gold)

We got 31 swimming medals and currently have 24 Track and Field medals. Sic wit it. Michael Phelps is getting ready for a return to bartering where gold rules while the women’s sprinters & swimmers could probably make an Olympic medal bridge home at this point. We also got 6 gymnastics medals, many thanks to Boston’s golden girl Aly Raisman. Beyond these three sports there are no other individual sports that we can really claim powerhouse status. 4 shooting medals isn’t bad and 3 diving is a step in the right direction of returning to greatness but we have our two good sports and we are damn good at them. We could probably do for a little development in other sports. Why don’t we race walk more often? We have lots of roads and I’m pretty sure half the country already practices when trying to avoid talking to people on the street or beat that family of seven onto the train.

Editor- I don't get this picture? Are we trading fish for grain or gold? Wha?

 2)      China-Current Count 80 (37 Gold)

China’s medal count looks dramatically different. They have 6-7 sports with 6-10 medals. Badminton, Diving, Gymnastics, Shooting, Swimming, Table Tennis & Weightlifting. Their strength is in the precision sports that require some accuracy or strength. Swimming seems to be the odd man out in this group because it is pure speed or endurance. Also missing from their list is any team sport that involves a ball. Starting learning to share China.

3)      Russia-Current Count 57 (12 Gold)

Russia’s big medal hauls are in gymnastics and track & field. They also have a handful of judo, weightlifting & wrestling medals. They have recently taken over the third spot in the medal counts from the home team and seem to be picking up medals slowly yet surely. In Olympic history they have 1 archery medal. They should start getting all Katnissed up in their massive country of woods and animals and start bringing home some of those medals. (They should also stop dressing up their Olympians like Bjork)

4)      Great Britain-Current Count 53 (25 Gold)

Editor- Actually this kid is Dutch
(Feynoord is a futbol club in Rotterdam, duh!),
but you get the idea, hooligans!

I personally think the medal count should have some sort of weighted system to take into account gold medals because GB is packing gold while Russia is packing bronze. The home team has a decent spread of medals with 9 in rowing and cycling. Second highest is sailing and track. I like it. They are winning lots of very British medals. I think they should start putting a lot more energy into combat sports so they can say “Bully” when punching people in the face or while round house kicking. They just need to focus all the aggressive energy soccer hooligans have and put into getting gold medals.

And not that you can be “losing” the medal count but…

7) Australia-Current Count 30 (7 Gold)

Australia has taken a serious dive in their medal count from their recent Olympic medal history. Unsurprisingly swimming took the lead with 10 but it is a huge disappointment for them considering only one is gold. They also have 5 rowing and 5 cycling being a former British colony and all. (America forged its own Olympic sport path, suck it Aussies) But I’m pretty sure the kangaroos are about to revolt and things are not looking up down under http://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/09/sports/olympics/olympic-medal-count-can-be-daily-source-of-discontent.html?pagewanted=all. My suggestion: go for more water sports besides just swimming. You are an island. You need to learn to sail and row better if you want to visit your neighbors anyway.

 Make sure you get your Olympic fill this weekend because you’ll have to wait 4 years for the next summer games. I will be back next week for an Olympic wrap-up and I will finally start sleeping more than 5 hours a night.

Friday

Men’s 4 x 400 Meters: The US has won it 7 consecutive times but did not have a single individual in the 400. Smells like trouble.

Women’s Field Hockey: Netherlands versus Argentia. I distinctly remember Netherlands being the hot team. Royer’s Prediction: Netherlands for the gold.

Women’s 4 x 100 Meters: In Beijing we fucked up and dropped the baton. We best have done some practicing. Royer’s Prediction: USA gets revenge and wins the gold.

Saturday

Women’s Basketball: USA has scored over 100 points more than any other team, it will be hard for them to loose. Royer’s Prediction: Gold for USA Bronze for Australia

Rhythmic Gymnastics All Around: Ribbon dancers, clubs, hoola hoops, kick-balls & ropes. Apparently a Russian woman dominates. One of the more bizarre ones.

Women’s 800: South African Castor Semenya has faced a lot of controversy with gender tests and is probably itching to show people up. Royer’s Prediction: Semenya for the gold.

Sunday

Men’s Volleyball: Returning gold medal champs took an uneremonial exit in the quarterfinals leaving the door wide open. Royer’s Prediction: Gold-Brazil, Silver-Russia, Bronze-Italy

Men’s Marathon: Ryan Hall listens to Moby Fuckin Dick when he runs. How can he not do well. Royer’s Prediction: Hall in the top 5.

Women’s Modern Pentathlon: The ultimate rich person sport. Royer’s Prediction: British get another hometown gold with Mhairi Spence.

Royer’s Prediction Scorecard

Correct: 12

In the ballpark but still wrong: 8

Not even close: 5

Also, my new favorite blog: http://mckaylaisnotimpressed.tumblr.com/

Olympic Correspondent Royer's Mysteries of the Olympics

So as the Olympics roll on, so does Olympic Correspondent Royer's insatiable appetite for blood world-class competition.  Today, Olympic Correspondent Royer lays out the mysteries of the London Olympics, which I will then attempt to solve, or detective the shit out of and guess the answer to using my keen senses and sweet moves I picked up from the streets. 

Mysteries of the Olympics

As you can probably tell by now I am an aggressive Olympic viewer but there lots of things that still leave me with questions.

Have Kate & Will learned to teleport?

They are doing an eerie job of getting to all of the major Olympic events, especially when British athletes are favored. I think there dedication is amazing btdubs, but it has started to make me wonder if they have learned to teleport (which by the way would be the superpower I choose, so much more time for activities). They are doing the wave one second and the next Kate looks like a pageant mom watching Louis Smith in the Pommel Horse finals. Dear Kate & Will, if you have learned the secret to teleporting please let me know. It would let me not miss any live Olympic action in the morning while on the T to work.

Detective's Verdict: Have Kate & Will learned to teleport?- Will & Kate are professionals at avoiding the paparazzi and the likes, prolly using secret entrances/exits, back alleys, getaway cars, and in all likelihood a bruising group of guards that smash anyone who gets in the way. Also wouldn't put it past them using a a royal helicopter.  So unfortunately no, these just some lame, rich muggles, not some Harry Potter teleporting.

Does Mo Farah & Galen Rupp’s teamwork mean the war is officially over?

The Boston Tea Party museum just re-opened. Whenever I am downtown I regularly look to the east just to make sure the British aren’t trying to invade. I felt like the Tea Party museum could have been the last straw. However, the teamwork of Farah & Rupp leading to a GB gold and USA silver in the 10,000 meters makes me feel like the war can finally be put to rest. Their celebration was a nice display of inter-national cooperation and teamwork. But next time Rupp, kick his ass.

Detective's Verdict: Does Mo Farah & Galen Rupp’s teamwork mean the war is officially over?- Nope, not even a little bit.  First, America wins the Revolution, then in 1812 they tried to blow up Baltimore, which we wrote a sweet jam about, and pulled some other shit that didn't end up working out, so when's it our turn to bombard the shit out of one of their middling coast cities?  Everyone's playing nice right now, but don't be fooled, its not over!  These guys both train together in the US, someone's Benedict Arnold-ing here and I don't like it!

Which came first, handball or water polo?

Did handball players say “this is too easy how can we double the difficulty of our sport?” or did water polo players say “fuck this shit, why don’t we just do this on land so we don’t have to tread water for hours?” I’ve heard many people say that water polo looks like torture. I’ve also had friends say if they were going to pick up any sport that it would be handball because they think they would be excellent at it. No one says that about water polo. So which came first? The chicken or the egg. The tired water polo players or the un-challenged handball players?

Detective's Verdict: Which came first, handball or water polo?- Handball for sure.  People in history weren't retarded.  Who ever thought treading water for a sport is definitely some bored rich guy with a swimming pool who wanted to torture his kids.  For evidence via handball, may it please the court if I submit that crazy Aztec game that is kinda like handball but if you lose you got sacrificed to the gods or some shit.  Boom! (wikipedia machine tells me that both modern games developed at the same time, end of 19th century, but handball as roots that go back much farther)

In the history of awkward hugs, where does the Kayla Maroney/Sandra Izbasa hug stand?

Kayla is the best vaulter in the world right now. She fucked up and got the silver. Izbasa is good but not the best and they both knew it. Awkward hug city. Kayla has a death stare that could probably stop a bear in its tracks. But Izbasa went in for the hug and held it for a while. Ballsy. Kayla still did a perfect vault in the team competition to mark her territory. We are still proud of her but I think she made it clear that she did not want to get touched. This hug probably goes somewhere between Voldemort hugging Draco and the stepbrother hugging scene:

Detective's Verdict: In the history of awkward hugs, where does the Kayla Maroney/Sandra Izbasa hug stand?- In America if you are expected to win and fall short, are you expected to be gracious and hug your opponent anyways? Over course not! America is built upon pride and winning! IF YOU'RE NOT FIRST YOU'RE LAST! Manifest destiny! This is how we built the railroads and the grand canyon!  The hugging is just a plot for the winner to seem gracious, the loser doesn't owe shit to that hug!  So to answer the question, is it even a hug if one person doesn't hug back?  Good work Kayla, refuse to play into that pity hugging, in America, you only get hugs if you win!

Tuesday

Men’s Triathlon: UK Brownlee brothers are the heavy favorites. Royer’s Prediction: Alistair beats Jonathan

Men’s 1500: Matt Centrowitz was looking good in the semis. I’m hoping he can get top 5.

Women’s 100m hurdles: Pregames attention hoarder LoLo Jones looks for redemption.

Women’s  Floor Exercise: Aly Raisman & Jordan Wieber will be the talk. Royer’s Prediction: Aly medals but Jordan does not. Nick's Prediction: Jordan stomps all over on some people's heads, shake and bake!

Wednesday

Women’s Beach Volleyball: Misty & Kerri have had some close calls. I don’t think we have a clear favorite right now.

Women’s 200 Meters: Jamaicans versus USA round lost count years ago. Royer’s Prediction: Felix for the gold.

Women’s K-4 500m: Kudos if you know what sport this is. Royer’s Prediction: Hungary & Portugal medal.

Thursday

Men’s Decathlon: America is real strong in this. Royer’s Prediction: Hardee & Eaton both medal with a gold medal by one

Men’s 800 Meters: Nick Symmonds is a bit of a wild card but I have high hopes.

Women’s Soccer: USA V Japan for the gold. Royer’s Prediction: USA gets redemption with a gold

Royer’s Prediction Scorecard

Correct: 7

In the ballpark but still wrong: 7

Not even close: 5

We are starting to get into team sport finals. Get excited. Until next time here are some pole vault bloopers/someone cocooning : http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/track-and-field/highlights-pole-vaulting-bloopers.html

Olympic Correspondent Royer's Olympic Disappointments

So Olympic Correspondent Royer is taking over the blog, that's okay, he watches way more events than anyone else I know!  Before he jetted off to Pittsburgh for the weekend, OCR has left us with his disappointments of the week, along with a look of what to look for over the weekend!

Disappointment is Part of the Games

Only 3 people win medals in each event. I can’t place the quote but I remember an announcer during an opening ceremonies saying that “for many athletes this will be the highlight of their games.” All of the Olympians are the world’s best but most go home without any hardware. While the past few days our Olympians have put in some amazing performances not everyone has new bling. To acknowledge this aspect of the Olympic Games, the theme of this post will be disappointment.

Personal Disappointment in NBC Primetime Olympic Coverage: I heart the shit out of America and I will stand by our athletes in good and bad times. After the men’s gymnastics catastrophic opening events in the team event NBC started ignoring them all together. I’ve noticed this as a general theme of their primetime coverage. Once something goes sour they cut it out entirely (unless it is Jordan Wieber crying, because they sure as hell have shown enough of that). They also don’t cover when an American gold medal favorite doesn’t win. Flag Bearer Mariel Zagunis lost in an early round and NBC covers it up. Not every Olympian’s dreams come true but we should still be proud of what they did. NBC step up your game. Also, why have we not seen Men’s Rings? What do you have against rings? I thought this was America.

 Disappointing Games for Taylor Phinney: While not in the league with Lochte, Felix or Misty & Kerri, Taylor Phinney was America’s hopes for road cycling medals. He got noticeably more media attention leading up to the games, especially with some romancing with Shawn Johnson in Beijing. While he seemed to give it his all, Taylor finished 4^th in both the roadrace and time trials. He is young so definitely has some more Olympics in him but finishing in 4^th has to be the hardest. Hopefully this is will only motivate him more for Rio. Both his parents are Olympic cyclists with medals so I’m sure he will come back strong to keep the family tradition alive.

Distraction much?

Beyond Disappointed about the Women’s Badminton Scandal: Have you watched one of the thrown matches? It is like they are slapping their competitors in the face every time they blatantly hit the birdie out of bounds or into the net. They have disgraced themselves and their countries.  I am so happy quick and decisive action was taken to prevent anything like this from ever happening again. These athletes should probably be deported from the planet for their blatant disrespect of the Olympic games and everything they stand for. General BOOO.

http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/badminton/highlights-badminton-players-try-to-throw-match.html

Disappointed I Didn’t Watch Women’s Fencing More: Not surprisingly Italy took the women’s team foil in dominating fashion after sweeping the individual competition. I have a new contender for hottest Olympians: Elisa Di Francisca. 

She was the individual champion and now team champion. Domination. She has a lot of passion while fencing, she does this weird floppy hand thing that fascinates me and has a good war cry. Elisa, you are probably in my top three at this point.

"I'm Italian, hear me roar!"

Editor- Apparently Olympic Fever transforms you into an Asian Elephant?
I may need a doctor to confirm this...

But I don’t want to leave on a bad note. I am sitting in the airport right now watching the first day of TRACK & FIELD!! Shit is about to get real. Swimming was just a warm-up for my main focus. I am already sleep deprived but I’m about to go Asiatic Elephant (apparently they only need 4 hours of sleep a day. For such a large-ass animal you would think they need lots of shut-eye to digest or something. Is it all elephants or just the Asian variety?) Ok, Asiatic Elephant rant over, onto what to watch during the next four days as I visit my own Olympic-loving family in Pittsburgh.

Friday

Men’s Shot Put: Have to highlight one of the first track gold medals. Royer’s Prediction: USA takes at least the silver.

Men’s 50 Free: Going to be a good race. I hope the drifter does well.

Women’s Keirin: This is apparently a cycling race. I have no fuckin clue, that is why I am going to watch. Royer’s Prediction: Home team for the gold (they might not even be in it, who knows?).

Saturday

Women’s Trampoline: Not really sure when this became a sport. Apparently our neighbors to the north are a powerhouse. I’ll give them some props. Royer’s Prediction: Canada for Gold.

Men’s 10,000: I feel a USA comeback in distance running. Royer’s Prediction: Rupp for bronze.

Women’s Single Skulls: Watch for Newton local Gevvie Stone.

Sunday

Men’s 100: I have never liked Usain. Someone please finish the race and wait to throw your hands in the air until you are actually done.

Women’s Marathon: I love Shalane Flanagan. Royer’s Prediction: Shalane for the bronze.

Women’s Vault: McKayla Maroney is a fuckin beast.

Monday

Men’s 105kg Weightlifting: This will be one of my random guesses. Royer’s prediction: Ivan Efremov from Uzbekistan takes gold.

Men’s 400 Meters: We swept in Beijing. Royer’s prediction: USA takes Gold.

Royer’s Prediction Scorecard

Correct: 5

In the ballpark but still wrong: 5

Not even close: 2

Happy Friday everyone. Remember to wear your red, white & blue.

Nick Inserts His Spare Olympic Thoughts: I had the pleasure of viewing Thursday night's prime time Olympic coverage with Olympic Correspondent Royer himself, who was all business, and even took the Sports Illustrated to scrapbook with after he had a Hebrew beer and enjoyed national IPA day the right way.  Here are some other thoughts:

• The Olympic boxing system is silly, and the referee's aren't helping themselves.  I saw a couple fights where a guy gets knocked out but not counted out and the bout kept going?  There was the time the ref dq'ed a guy for holding twice?  And the constant standing counts? Here's a secret to help improve IOC, they're wearing head gear so if they're still standing and making an effort to box, they don't need to be counted!
• Little known fact, yelling at the TV for rowers, swimmers, runners, etc. to "go faster!" does indeed help the athletic performance of those individuals. Truth...
• "That sideline reporter needs to be taken out and put out of her misery"-Olympic Correspondent Royer on the Andrea Kramer, sideline reporter for swimming events on NBC
• They are really hammering the Mom demographic with all these commercials.  It's like "Hey Mom, if you buy Kellogg's for breakfast or Tide to wash my clothes, maybe I'll grow up to be a world class athlete in some obscure sport people only pay attention to every 4 years!"